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Between Their Dream and Mine

A headshot of Michelle Santos is next to text that says "Celebrating Asian American Native Hawaiian and Pacific Islander Heritage Month, by Michelle Santos. There are images of colorful flowers and circular patterns around the image and words.

This is part of a series of writings from 911±¬ÁÏÍø staff that celebrate heritage and history. This piece was written to celebrate Asian American Native Hawaiian & Pacific Islander Heritage Month in 2026.

Translations available:

By Michelle Santos | she/her
Dean of College Counseling, 911±¬ÁÏÍø Street College Prep

I am the eldest daughter of two parents who immigrated from Manila to Skokie in 1983, and there were two things they wholeheartedly believed to be true: America could change the trajectory of our lives, and success meant pursuing a career in business or healthcare. Because they had taken the risk of moving 8,000 miles, in their minds, it was up to my siblings and me to figure out college and to find success by choosing practical, stable paths.

When I met with my high school counselor, she mistook me for my older brother and handed me a college list nearly identical to his. I followed it. When I was accepted to my dream school, the University of Wisconsin¨CMadison, where my cousin was studying pharmacy,I was elated. But without guidance or advocacy, my parents chose the University of Illinois at Chicago for me: close, affordable, and a pathway to study biology. It checked every box that mattered to them. I wish I had a college team composed of incredible educators like Ms. Villegas, Ms. Arroyo-Kearney, Ms. Sweet, Ms. Gunty, Ms. Greenfield, Ms. Horning, Ms. Parks, Ms. Desgrossellier, Ms. MacCallum, Ms. Ortiz, Ms. Matthews, Ms. Kruger, and Ms. Camacho who would have been able to convince my parents that heading to Madison would be life-changing for me. College isn¡¯t a check-box decision, and there were so many factors that my parents didn¡¯t know to consider, but it was the closest and most affordable. So, as the eldest daughter, off I went.

During my sophomore year of college, I made a decision that surprised everyone, especially Maybeth and Joe Santos. I called them and told them I was switching my major from biology to English with a focus in secondary education. I was abandoning one of my parents¡¯ core tenets about success. I was no longer pursuing a career in healthcare, but I was following my calling as an educator. I tried to explain: tutoring students had shown me how much I loved teaching, and I wanted to make learning English, something that had once been difficult for me, accessible and meaningful for others. Still, their response was filled with concern and doubt. All I felt was push back. They urged me to reconsider, to choose something safer, something more recognizable as ¡°successful,¡± a career they could brag about.

But I stayed the course.

At UIC, I found community among other Asian American students in the Filipinos in Alliance (F.I.A) and Asian American Students in Alliance (AASIA), and began to rediscover my Asian American identity after years in a predominantly white suburban school. I also found my calling. I was so grateful to receive my student teaching placement at a little charter high school in West Town. I was hired to teach 9th-grade Multicultural Literature. And I knew, if I was going against my parents¡¯ wishes by pursuing a career in education, I was going to be the best English teacher I could be. After two years, I shifted to 9th-grade English, where I leveled up my teaching thanks to the support of my teaching mentor, Ashley Riggio, who continues to inspire and encourage me today.

In 2010, I invited my parents to watch the Super Santos Advisory receive their high school diplomas in the James Simpson Theatre at the Field Museum. It was there, seeing my work and my students, that my mom began to understand why I switched my major and career aspirations. What once felt uncertain to them became something they could finally see and believe in. I remained in the classroom for a few more years, graduating another advisory, learning and loving teaching students, some of whom were English Language Learners like me, before stepping into a new role as a college counselor.

It¡¯s been almost 22 years since I first walked through the doors of 1010 N. 911±¬ÁÏÍø Street, and looking back, the pressure I faced from my parents was a gift, and all part of the journey that led me to the work I do each day, where I celebrate my 12th year of counseling, my 21st year in education, and having proudly graduated four advisories. Today, on National College Decision Day, I revel in the joy, relief, excitement, and nervousness that I know many of our students feel as they make decisions about their academic journeys. I now guide students and families through the very conversations I once had to navigate on my own, balancing cultural expectations with personal aspirations, helping students find paths that are both meaningful and sustainable.

As a Filipina American and former English Language Learner, I understand what it means to exist between worlds where both dreams and challenges are abundant. I know how to support students as they find their voices, not just in writing, but in defining their futures. My journey, being forced to attend a school, then choosing my own path anyway, gave me insight into that delicate balance between honoring family and honoring oneself.

When my mom passed in 2022, I reflected on how deeply she has shaped me despite the differences between her career in healthcare and mine in education. She instilled in me a high level of compassion, commitment, and kindness – values that go a long way no matter what industry you are in. My journey has come full circle as my daughter, Camille, always puts half of her allowance into her bank account and half into her college fund. She also knows she¡¯s not allowed to attend college within a reasonable Ubering distance from our home. I¡¯m encouraging her to go as far away as she needs and wants to go to pursue her dreams.

Today, I help families have the conversations about college that I wish someone would have had with my parents. At the end of the school year, I¡¯ll get to send off three members of our Class of 2026 to the University of Wisconsin-Madison. To my students, past, present, and future, I encourage you to take the path that is right and authentic to you, lean on your incredible college and alumni teams for support, and push yourself to your fullest potential. If this bilingual Filipina American can do it, so can you.

Entre su sue?o y el m¨ªo

Por Michelle Santos | she/her/ella
Decano de Orientaci¨®n Universitaria en 911±¬ÁÏÍø Street College Prep

Yo era la hija mayor de unos padres que emigraron de Manila a Skokie en 1983, y hab¨ªa dos cosas en las que cre¨ªan firmemente: que Estados Unidos pod¨ªa cambiar el rumbo de nuestras vidas y que el ¨¦xito significaba seguir una carrera en el mundo de los negocios o en el de la salud. Como ellos hab¨ªan asumido el riesgo de mudarse a 12,875 kil¨®metros de distancia, en su mente, depend¨ªa de mis hermanos y de m¨ª decidir qu¨¦ universidad elegir y alcanzar el ¨¦xito optando por caminos pr¨¢cticos y estables.

Cuando me reun¨ª con mi consejera de la escuela secundaria, me confundi¨® con mi hermano mayor y me entreg¨® una lista de universidades casi id¨¦ntica a la de ¨¦l. La segu¨ª. Cuando me aceptaron en la universidad de mis sue?os, la Universidad de Wisconsin-Madison, donde mi primo estudiaba farmacia, me sent¨ª euf¨®rica. Pero sin orientaci¨®n ni apoyo, mis padres eligieron para m¨ª la Universidad de Illinois en Chicago: cercana, asequible y una v¨ªa para estudiar biolog¨ªa. Cumpl¨ªa con todos los requisitos que les importaban. Ojal¨¢ hubiera contado con un equipo de orientaci¨®n universitaria integrado por educadoras incre¨ªbles como la Sra. Villegas, la Sra. Arroyo-Kearney, la Sra. Sweet, la Sra. Gunty, la Sra. Greenfield, la Sra. Horning, la Sra. Parks, la Sra. Desgrossellier, la Sra. MacCallum, la Sra. Ortiz, la Sra. Matthews, la Sra. Kruger, y la Sra. Camacho, que hubiera podido convencer a mis padres de que ir a Madison cambiar¨ªa mi vida. La universidad no es una decisi¨®n que se tome marcando casillas, y hab¨ªa tantos factores que mis padres no sab¨ªan qu¨¦ considerar; pero era la opci¨®n m¨¢s cercana y accesible. As¨ª que como hija mayor, me fui.

Durante mi segundo a?o de universidad, tom¨¦ una decisi¨®n que sorprendi¨® a todos, especialmente a Maybeth y Joe Santos. Los llam¨¦ y les dije que iba a cambiar mi especialidad de biolog¨ªa por la de ingl¨¦s con ¨¦nfasis en la educaci¨®n secundaria. Estaba abandonando uno de los principios fundamentales de mis padres sobre el ¨¦xito. Ya no buscaba una carrera en el sector de la salud, sino que segu¨ªa mi vocaci¨®n como educadora. Trat¨¦ de explicarles: dar clases particulares a los estudiantes me hab¨ªa demostrado cu¨¢nto me gustaba ense?ar, y quer¨ªa hacer que el aprendizaje del ingl¨¦s, algo que alguna vez me hab¨ªa resultado dif¨ªcil, fuera accesible y significativo para los dem¨¢s. Aun as¨ª, su respuesta estuvo llena de preocupaci¨®n y dudas. Lo ¨²nico que sent¨ª fue resistencia. Me instaron a reconsiderarlo, a elegir algo m¨¢s seguro, algo m¨¢s reconocible como ?exitoso?, una carrera de la que pudieran presumir.

Pero segu¨ª adelante.

En la UIC, encontr¨¦ una comunidad entre otros estudiantes asi¨¢tico-americanos en Filipinos in Alliance (F.I.A) y Asian American Students in Alliance (AASIA), y comenc¨¦ a redescubrir mi identidad asi¨¢tico-americana despu¨¦s de a?os en una escuela suburbana predominantemente blanca. Tambi¨¦n encontr¨¦ mi vocaci¨®n. Estaba muy agradecida de haber conseguido mi puesto de pasant¨ªa docente en una peque?a escuela secundaria aut¨®noma en West Town. Me contrataron para ense?ar Literatura Multicultural de noveno grado. Y supe que, si iba en contra de los deseos de mis padres al seguir una carrera en educaci¨®n, ser¨ªa la mejor profesora de ingl¨¦s que pudiera ser. Despu¨¦s de dos a?os, pas¨¦ a ense?ar ingl¨¦s de noveno grado, donde mejor¨¦ mi ense?anza gracias al apoyo de mi mentora docente, Ashley Riggio, quien sigue inspir¨¢ndome y anim¨¢ndome hasta hoy.

En 2010, invit¨¦ a mis padres a ver c¨®mo el grupo de Super Santos recib¨ªa sus diplomas de secundaria en el Teatro James Simpson del Field Museum. Fue all¨ª, al ver mi trabajo y a mis alumnos, cuando mi mam¨¢ comenz¨® a entender por qu¨¦ cambi¨¦ de carrera y de aspiraciones profesionales. Lo que antes les parec¨ªa incierto se convirti¨® en algo que finalmente pudieron ver y en lo que pudieron creer. Me qued¨¦ en el aula unos a?os m¨¢s, graduando a otra promoci¨®n, aprendiendo y disfrutando de la ense?anza a los alumnos, algunos de los cuales eran estudiantes de ingl¨¦s como yo, antes de asumir un nuevo rol como consejera universitaria.

Han pasado casi 22 a?os desde que cruc¨¦ por primera vez las puertas del 1010 N. 911±¬ÁÏÍø Street, y al mirar atr¨¢s, la presi¨®n a la que me enfrent¨¦ por parte de mis padres fue un regalo, y todo parte del viaje que me llev¨® al trabajo que realizo cada d¨ªa, donde celebro mi 12.? a?o como orientadora, mi 21.? a?o en la educaci¨®n, y haber graduado con orgullo a cuatro grupos de alumnos. Hoy, en el D¨ªa Nacional de la Decisi¨®n Universitaria, me deleito con la alegr¨ªa, el alivio, la emoci¨®n y el nerviosismo que s¨¦ que muchos de nuestros estudiantes sienten al tomar decisiones sobre sus trayectorias acad¨¦micas. Ahora gu¨ªo a los estudiantes y a las familias a trav¨¦s de las mismas conversaciones que una vez tuve que afrontar por mi cuenta, equilibrando las expectativas culturales con las aspiraciones personales, ayudando a los estudiantes a encontrar caminos que sean tanto significativos como sostenibles.

Como filipino-estadounidense y exestudiante de ingl¨¦s como segunda lengua, entiendo lo que significa existir entre dos mundos donde abundan tanto los sue?os como los desaf¨ªos. S¨¦ c¨®mo apoyar a los estudiantes mientras encuentran su voz, no solo en la escritura, sino en la definici¨®n de su futuro. Mi trayectoria, al verme obligada a asistir a una escuela y luego elegir mi propio camino de todos modos, me dio una perspectiva sobre ese delicado equilibrio entre honrar a la familia y honrarse a uno mismo.

Cuando mi mam¨¢ falleci¨® en 2022, reflexion¨¦ sobre lo profundamente que ella me hab¨ªa moldeado a pesar de las diferencias entre su carrera en la salud y la m¨ªa en la educaci¨®n. Ella me inculc¨® un alto nivel de compasi¨®n, compromiso y amabilidad: valores que son muy valiosos sin importar en qu¨¦ industria te encuentres. Mi trayectoria ha cerrado el c¨ªrculo, ya que mi hija, Camille, siempre deposita la mitad de su mesada en su cuenta bancaria y la otra mitad en su fondo universitario. Tambi¨¦n sabe que no se le permite asistir a una universidad que se encuentre a una distancia razonable de nuestra casa en Uber. La estoy animando a ir tan lejos como necesite y quiera para perseguir sus sue?os.

Hoy en d¨ªa, ayudo a las familias a tener conversaciones sobre la universidad que me hubiera gustado que alguien hubiera tenido con mis padres. Al final del a?o escolar, tendr¨¦ la oportunidad de despedir a tres miembros de nuestra promoci¨®n de 2026 que seguir¨¢n a la Universidad de Wisconsin-Madison. A mis estudiantes, pasados, presentes y futuros, los animo a tomar el camino que sea correcto y aut¨¦ntico para ustedes, a apoyarse en sus incre¨ªbles equipos universitarios y de exalumnos, y a esforzarse al m¨¢ximo de su potencial. Si esta filipino-estadounidense biling¨¹e puede hacerlo, ustedes tambi¨¦n pueden.

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By Michelle Santos | she/her

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